Pamper Thyself

For the past 4 years my friend Marisa had been cutting my hair. We met junior year in college and once she told me she aspired to be a cosmetologist, I knew we’d be the best of friends. This would save me some serious cash. After all, money saved from haircuts meant more money for downtown. Let’s be serious, who has money in college to spend on other things besides booze? You had to weigh the value of necessities and 9 times out of 10, alcohol won. I offered to pay Marisa some money but she always said alcohol would be my payment. So naturally, we’d make a pregame out of the beautifying experience. We’d make Bloody Marys, put on some good music and talk about our plans for the night. Getting my haircut had never been so enjoyable. However, the only downside to Marisa cutting my hair was that I never really felt pampered. Sure it was free, but I wanted her to wash my hair and massage my scalp like they do at the salon but she refused!

For a person with curly hair, the shampoo and conditioning is the highlight of my salon experience for two reasons. First, it’s obviously euphoric. I want to close one eye and lift up one leg, twitching it like my dog does when I find the right spot on his belly, but I have to control myself. After all, I am in public. Secondly, it’s the only time it’s acceptable for someone to rub my scalp. I don’t get that privilege when my hair is dry and curly. People can’t play with my hair or if they do, there are rules that they must follow. For instance, you can’t take a curl and with two hands, pull it apart. You can’t be rough with the curls. You can’t run fingers through my hair or try and style my hair a particular way. Doing one or all of the above results in a serious afro and I’m not trying to look like Richard Simmons. You have to be gentle with curls. Basically, all you get to do is pick them up and examine them or pull them and watch them spring, which still feels good. But, I’m usually not trustworthy of who is touching my hair. They always get carried away. You can restyle straight hair, but once curls are ruined, it’s the end of looking good.

The last time I had my hair cut was in January. It was time to get some bounce back to the curls but I could never coordinate it with Marisa. She lives in Wilmington and our paths don’t cross as conveniently as they used to. After 10 months, it was time to face the reality of the situation and make an appointment at a salon. (I haven’t spent money on a haircut in 4 years, so of course I’ve become spoiled!) So after picking a place that looked normal from the outside and discovering that it only cost $45 for a haircut, I knew I could handle this. $45 in college was like $100. $45 in the real world making money is actually not bad at all. It’s cheaper than filling up my tank. (I have an SUV, but I wish I had a horse and carriage instead. That would be a true protest to our country’s dependency on oil!) Anyway, the moral of the story is that even though it seems like the economy is disappearing into some vortex, we can always make room in our bank accounts to get pampered. We just might have to make some adjustments to our spending habits until we get paid again. So when the country doesn’t make you feel good, go to a salon so they can make you feel better…until you turn on the news again.

Romance is dead.

A couple weeks ago, I decided to watch The Notebook for the umpteenth time. I was in one of those lonely moods and The Notebook seemed like the perfect movie to deepen my depression. Of course, considering my mood, I started crying as the opening credits debuted. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not a lovey dovey romance movie type of girl. I actually boycotted seeing The Notebook for years because I thought it would be as torturous as watching A Walk to Remember. Obviously, I finally gave in, and now think that The Notebook is the most beautiful and inspiring love story. However, as the movie went on, I found myself actually getting fired up, throwing my hands in the air, shaking my head, and wondering why the f*** doesn’t anyone treat romance like this anymore… with tears streaming down my face. Romance in a nutshell, is dead.

When’s the last time a guy or girl went out of their way to show their interest? When I think about that question, all I hear are crickets. The last time it happened to me was 6 years ago. 6 years! WTF! Mind you, that was before all the technological advancements. Since then, my encounters have been alcohol related or reduced to texts, instant chat, e-mail, Facebook and MySpace.

(However, those MySpacers are creepy. I get random messages from people that I would actually call stalkers. One time, after not responding to a guy, he actually wrote me again saying that I was beautiful on the outside but dead on the inside. HA! Wow. Thanks buddy, but you know nothing about me. I’m a delicate flower, blossoming with life on the inside and just because you can’t get my pollen doesn’t mean you can try and sting me. )

Guys and girls are at fault here. We are hiding behind the computer screen. We are becoming closed off from intimacy. We can pretend to be flirtatious by poking each other on Facebook but that’s not what I consider flirting. Besides, that’s not the way I want to get poked. I think that with all the methods of communication that are present today, we are becoming too dependent on them that it’s affecting how relationships begin. There are so many ways that you can connect and communicate with people today that it’s ruining the thrill and excitement of meeting someone IN PERSON.

It makes sense, there’s less anxiety when it comes to asking someone out through a text. But it’s the easy and lame way out. These advancements are giving us easier options to express our feelings without feeling under pressure. You are not afraid to say how you feel hiding behind the computer screen. You can sit there and think about what you want to say, type it, contemplate sending it and ultimately say “f*** it” to yourself and hit send. I’ll be honest, I’ve done it. It’s less stress for me. But do I really want to start my relationships like that? Nooooooooo.

There are some instances where people do let you know they are interested without a computer or cell phone. For instance, a drive-by shouting always let’s you know that someone thinks you look good. But then they drive off and it’s a missed connection. However, you can always depend on the ones you would never ever date to hit on you. How about guys with no teeth? They never have a problem telling you how they feel. At least you know they won’t bite. It’s flattering and all but I want someone who is going to be able to brush their teeth while I’m sitting on the toilet. That’s what they do in the movies right? Why can’t the guys with teeth show interest by just saying hello. That’s all it takes. There are billions of people in this world, yet I feel so detached from the guys. Put the man back in romance!

There are plenty of opportunities to meet someone everyday. Yet it’s not happening. I could meet someone at the grocery store, dog park, or outdoor concerts. But I’m not. You know why? Well besides the fact I think guys are cowards, it’s because no one makes eye contact. I did some experimenting, I went out and I tried to make eye contact with a couple dudes and it wasn’t working. They either thought they were too cool for school, wouldn’t smile or they would look away instantly. I’ll be honest; I’m not an unattractive person. I’m quite the catch. But come on, why won’t anyone make eye contact? Do I have to wear a computer screen over my face in order for someone to feel comfortable talking to me?

I’m sorry, but I’m tired of talking to people through the computer or only when they’re drunk. That’s not how I want someone to win my affection. Bring back the romance. Call me old-fashioned but I want to be swept off my feet. I don’t want to have to wear the pants and make the first move. I want it to be mutual and the only way I can feel that is through making eye contact with someone. Instead, there’s no “seize the moment” mentality because you know that if you really wanted to, you could look someone up on Facebook or be (in my book) a total wimp and post your missed moment under Craiglist’s “Missed Connections”. Guys and Girls, here’s a thought, grow some baseballs and seize the moment.

Go Yearbookyourself.com

Let's face it. We're addicts. We live for the internet. We can't function without the internet. It controls us. But whatever, it's awesome. We're all curious by nature but with the internet, it breeds a much higher level of curiosity. I love how I can discover ANYTHING with a simple tap of my finger. It just feels so good in the morning when I have a hot cup of coffee and I make that anticipated double click to see what's going on in the world - and by world, I mean Facebook, e-mail and a little CNN.

Due to my addiction, I can't resist a mindless internet activity. So while browsing a friend's profile on Facebook the other day, I found a new webpage obsession for all to enjoy.

http://www.yearbookyourself.com/

I've always wanted to know what I would have looked like in the past, especially since there were so many hairstyles that were out of whack. I mean, how could I, Jordan, a girl with curly hair, look good with a short bob? I don't know how I would have been able to go steady with someone. Anyway, this website made all my dreams come true. It granted my wish of seeing what I'd look like with the popular hairstyles and fashions through the decades. Needless to say, I'm happy with my current look. However, in 10 years, I'll probably think I looked like a poodle.

Although the real purpose of yearbookyourself.com is to partner with malls around the country to promote their participating stores, it is extremely entertaining. I just don't know how effective the partnership is because we live in a narcissistic era. People will be paying more attention to themselves rather than what stores they could visit to get that particular decade style. At least yearbookyourself.com can guarantee traffic and exposure due to the website's popularity.

So, if you are up for a little photo upload, time traveling, and a good laugh I highly recommend you check it out. If you're like me, you'll upload a picture to see yourself as the opposite sex too. Or I'm just weird. But hey, what can I say? The internet controls me.

Deep thoughts with Jordan Sullivan

Have you ever thought about what time you wish you could travel back to? As much as I would love to get groovy and trip on back to the 60s and 70s, I would have to say that I've always wanted to travel back in time to the days when the Native Americans roamed the earth.


In college, I took a Native American literature class, which was awesome, but it was disappointing and sad to read that they are often referred to as, and falsely identified as, these blood-thirsty savages. In reality, they were the complete opposite. They were peaceful individuals who sought the truth in nature. The animals, weather, elders, trees, sky, landscapes, and wind would give them the answers they desired. They had an unbelievable respect and devotion to the Earth. Politics, organized religion, money, and education didn't exist, which meant there wasn't any corruption. Just peace through the wind in the trees. To me, they had a beautiful way of life. I would love to be one with nature.

Think about this. Aren't some of the most beautiful places in the world, majestic landscapes untouched by mankind? How about the feeling of peace when surrounded by nature? I don't know about you, but when I am in a forest or in the mountains and I hear nothing but nature, I become very peaceful. That's what I imagine the Native American way of life to be like.

I think that of all the groups of people throughout the history of the world, Native Americans had it right. It's depressing to think that their population and way of life were destroyed when colonists began to develop America. How could they be threatened by a peaceful group of people? If they weren't killed, they were converted to Christianity or forced to become "Americanized". Their love for Earth meant nothing to Europeans who began to destroy the Earth with the first "timber". The one thing that I don't get is how those that believe God created this world, are destroying His world. I shouldn't even have to explain how tearing down trees, decimating species, polluting the earth, and destroying habitats are a complete disregard for His creation.


Anyway, this story told by a tribal elder in Apocalypto is the reason for the desire to share my opinion...


And a Man sat alone, drenched deep in sadness. And all the animals drew near to him and said, "We do not like to see you so sad. Ask us for whatever you wish and you shall have it." The Man said, "I want to have good sight." The vulture replied, "You shall have mine." The Man said, "I want to be strong." The jaguar said, "You shall be strong like me." Then the Man said, "I long to know the secrets of the earth." The serpent replied, "I will show them to you." And so it went with all the animals. And when the Man had all the gifts that they could give, he left. Then the owl said to the other animals, "Now the Man knows much, he'll be able to do many things. Suddenly I am afraid." The deer said, "The Man has all that he needs. Now his sadness will stop." But the owl replied, "No. I saw a hole in the Man, deep like a hunger he will never fill. It is what makes him sad and what makes him want. He will go on taking and taking, until one day the World will say, 'I am no more and I have nothing left to give.'"


Open your mind and absorb this story. Tell me if you agree with it.

Nice Blackberry. You must be rich.

Earlier this year, my friend Denise, who keeps up with the latest fashion and technology, boxed up her fairly new Blackberry for the new iPhone. I on the other hand, had a phone that looked like it ran with the bulls. I don't know why but I had this tendency to forget that I was holding the phone, thus dropping it at least once a day. I still am perplexed as to how I almost flushed it down the toilet one day during work. I mean there is a huge difference between toilet paper and a cell phone right? Anyway, so when Denise was showing off her new iPhone, she, being the generous type, told me I could have her Blackberry. You would have thought that she told me I was going to meet the cast of Six Feet Under by the way my face lit up. I obviously complied with her offer.

So after I spent a few hours playing with my hip, expensive phone, I began to feel this sense of power. Like I was officially a true professional with a Blackberry. I even felt cool holding the phone up to my ear. This is materialism at it's best. I felt a sense of power, which led to a new identity, from a simple item that I owned. It's pretty sad if you think about it but I couldn't help myself. However, that feeling subsided once I realized that I was being judged by my Blackberry.

Some brands, like Blackberry's, are so strong that the general consensus is that Blackberry caters to the upperclass population. Brands have the power to make us feel like we are a part of it. So, in a way, they give us an identity. The downside to this is that others, also, assign us an identity primarily by the brands we support, which could oftentimes be incorrect. So when people would see me with my Blackberry, they would say, "look at you and your expensive Blackberry" or "ohhh, you have a Blackberry", thus, implying that I had money. I actually had to explain myself and say, "It's not what you think, my friend gave it to me." I don't like how people automatically assume that because I have a Blackberry, I am rich. That's not the case, I just know people who have money. Ha. Ha.

But don't you think it's twisted, yet funny that we are judged by the materials we own? I'm tempted to go out unknown wearing an over-sized tweety bird t-shirt, jean shorts, keds, tease my hair with lots of hairspray and put on some blue eye shadow, heavy mascara and black eyeliner. What do you think people's impression would be? I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that everyone would assume that I am lower class, uneducated and own a trailer.

Basically, we could be anything people want us to be by the items we own/wear. If you think about it, the things we own tell a story about who we are. In particular, we buy clothes that are parallel with our identity. There are some clothes that I don't buy because "they aren't me" and I think you can agree. What we wear is rhetorical. If I am out wearing khaki shorts, Columbia hiking shoes, and a Patagonia fleece, you can pretty much determine that I am an outdoor-oriented individual.

The point I'm trying to make here, is that we can very easily fool people by what we own. Our core doesn't matter. Our appearence does, which, excuse me, sucks because people can be too quick to judge. Let's admit it, we all are guilty. We don't give each other a chance to discover what makes up our core. It's a cliche statement but it's true. You can't judge a book by it's cover. Maybe we can change the world if we make an effort to not judge someone and to actually find out who they are as a person, not as a material. But that will be challenging because as Madonna says, "We live in a material world."

Hello Originality? You out there?

Remember that time when you were in school and you had on an outfit that you knew looked good on you? And then you look over and see that someone else is wearing the exact same thing. Oh the horror! Let's hope you didn't sit next to the person in class because that's even more awkward. In my own memory, I couldn't help but wonder if I at least bought the outfit first. However, why is it that we feel so territorial when we see that we own the same item of clothing as somebody else? Maybe because we want to create our own style, which means we ain't sharing our image with nobody else! Even though it's different in it's own light, I see the same thing occur with advertisements.


The other day I was sitting on my couch, soaking up life and watching TV when a commercial came on for the new Lavender Lilac Gain. The commercial had the potential to be great, but to me, it failed miserably. It starts out in a hotel room with a woman laying in bed, snuggling blissfully in the covers, and practically moaning as she sniffs the soothing scent of the freshly washed sheets. Cue to the door and in walks a couple who just checked into the room. The woman in bed turns out to be the housekeeper and she calmly and without saying a word, gets out of bed, makes the bed, throws two mints on the pillows and walks out the door. Funny right? Well then Gain uses the tagline, "could you use a moment?". With that, I IMMEDIATELY thought of Twix's "need a moment?" tagline. Ouch. That's not good. Shame on you Gain advertisers. Maybe the people at Twix will send you a pity box of Twix candybars so you can take a moment to think about what you did wrong. Here's a hint, where's the orginality?!


I'm sorry but if I worked for an advertising agency, which I'm trying to, I would not have let that commecial be produced until we came up with an original, jaulting tagline so that we could call it our own, rather than be perceived as reminiscent of Twix's commercials, which practically has the same premise with the awkward moments. Or if I liked the idea so much, I would have evolved it into something better, but different. The whole point of an advertisment is to make a mark in someone's mind. Twix already made their mark in mine with their "need a moment" commecials. Therefore, I couldn't accept Gain's "could you use a moment" commercial because my mind was already programmed to Twix.


Here's another example, there is this billboard for First Citizens bank that uses the same colors, font and similar design as Detla airlines. So whenever I'm approaching the billboard I think that it's an advertisement for Delta but then I read the words and company logo and realize it's for First Citizens Bank. Again, First Citizens had a chance to make a mark in my mind but they didn't due to the fact that my mind was already programmed to Delta's colors and font. I guess when brainstorming and comparing the different colors and fonts, Delta's just flew right over their head.


Any work I do has to be original and brilliant. I don't want to be a reflection. I expect the same from advertising/branding agencies, especially since their work is viewed and perceived by the general population of consumers. They have a chance to change the world and the only way they can do it is if they embrace the notion of originality and it's potential to make a serious impact on us.